A slightly oxymoronic rail service between Brussels and Zaventem that calls at all stations. Fortunately it isn't that far! A particularly grey and brown Belgian city, full of paintings of voluptuous 17th Century maidens in various states of undress. Home to some of the finest cafes in the country. The name literally means throwing a hand, which says it all One of an extensive row of smallish brick boxes, usually assembled in extensive rows, three to four boxes tall.
Place of residence for the vast majority of urban Belgians. Gentle rolling undulations in the south of Belgium that are locally revered as an untamed wilderness. In reality they consist of extensive plantation pine forest, trickling rivulets and fields of cows. Nonetheless they do make a pleasant day out. Don't forget your raincoat. Treasured and worshiped annually for about a month.
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The sadly short asparagus season is an annual opportunity to spend a vast fortune on green and white bits of wood dripping in garlic and butter. An enormous rusting molecule that is visible for several miles from its location in northern Brussels. Contains an incredibly boring exhibition about something or other. A month of dangerously pleasant weather when Belgium does its utmost to discourage tourists from coming and spoiling life there by generally completely shutting down for three weeks or so.
Warm and cosy building in which a variety of forms of happiness can be obtained in exchange for one or two coins. No matter where you stand in Belgium, you are within metres of a bakery. Transformed on Sunday mornings into claustrophobic spaces full of robust women purchasing enormous paper boxes of sticky tarts. A heavenly liquid which Belgians have perfected thanks to centuries of intense contemplation by silent orders of monks. Beer is the very essence of the land, the blood of the nation, heaven served in a variety of peculiarly shaped drinking receptacles.
Cool old crumbly bits of Belgian towns that are covered in cobbled alleyways and plaques bearing impressively historic dates. Unfortunately nobody seems to know exactly what they were used for and why so many of them have not fallen down by now.
